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Friday, March 11, 2011

Crazy. Chaotic. Perfect.

This is a crazy life. Last night we walked into a restaurant and all eyes turned on us. We made an entrance! That is how it is with us. Maybe it was the sudden shift in the noise level, or the four stairsteps marching to the beat of their own drum, or that most people don't drag four children out for sushi. But this week I have been delighting in that.  I love that people don't hide their surprise when I say all four of them are mine. I love that they think I am a little crazy. It is a little crazy, a lot chaotic, and pretty wild. It's an adventure....and I wouldn't have it any other way.

We have settled into a bit of a routine with Daddy's new job. I have an aversion to routine. And I thought this week would be a good chance for mama to get a little preemptive break before spring break. Read: nine days of full on kid mode. What I didn't realize was that it was Texas Public Schools week and that I would spend my week pulling rabbits out of hats. And my favorite trick was making chili with 21 kindergartners. There were a few wistful moments where I felt my heart tug towards teaching. But the truth is that it was really awesome just to be Elisha's mama. He was excited to have me there. While it was fun to teach and use those gifts a little, it was even better to leave chili fest holding my proud little man's hand. I don't have a single memory of having one of my parent's in my classroom as a child. It was great to hear him retell it all to his sisters...and then again daddy at dinner.

I will be the first to admit that there are days where I want to be anything but a stay at home mom. It's not because I don't love being with my kids. It's that I don't feel like I accomplish anything. There is no recognition. There is no chance to be brilliant or ambitious. And there is a lot of routine.

But yesterday as we were hanging out at the park after school...which we do most days... I realized something. I did something. I do something everyday. I give my four little people a childhood. Every book I read. Every afternoon wasted on a playground. Every lunch box. Every holiday. Every song turned up on the radio to sing-a-long. Every picnic. Every birthday party. Every craft project. Every recipe. Every iloveyouandyouaresoawesome.

A childhood.

It's brilliant, ambitious, and I recognize it.

And now we are off to kick off spring break and this amazing weather with a picnic. One that is brilliant... and ambitious even. <3


  1. Girl, you rock! I love reading your blog!! As a stay-at-home mom, we just get paid in hugs and kisses! I LOVE how you put that we are giving our children a childhood! Beautiful!!

  2. I so enjoy your ability to put life into the word you put on paper, Amanda. Yes, you are doing something important, don't ever forget it. While you are being the center of the world for you children you are also healing yourself. God is really awesome, you know.I once had a psychologist friend of mine tell me he believed that what is important to us as adults is that which we were deprived of in childhood." He collected semi precious stones. He felt the need came from the fact that a beloved grandmother gave him a semi precious stone as a little boy and another boy stole it from him. The boy denied that he took it was never returned. It was hard for my friend to put into words how important it was to collect these stones as an adult. You collect happy, protected, loved children Amanda. And btw, the picture of you and Elisha is beautiful. You mature more beautiful than I even remember you. Your beauty is from within.In His Love PJ

  3. I like this.

    It's hard to realize that you ARE doing something, something that has a lasting impact, when you are a stay at home mom. Particularly because you never get a finished product.

  4. Agreeing with the brilliance of giving childhood to children!

    Visiting from Blog Gems and glad I did!